Jets Get Mad, Even

The angry, loud mouth New York Jets went into Foxboro and beat their rival New England Patriots to earn a trip to the AFC Championship game. That’s what you get for taking better care of your hair than the ball, Tom.

New York (A) avenged for their 45-3 spanking from the Pats in early December. But that was last year. In this meeting, Rex Ryan channeled the roid rage to make his players feel disrespected and forced them to prove that all their shit talk isn’t for shit, yo. In tandem with an imperfect Bill Belichick squad wamp wamp performance, the Jets came out victorious and have just one week to run their mouths, study the Steelers and hope Ben Roethlisberger doesn’t rape them (oh!).

Santonio Holmes is Only Tempting Roethisberger

The Patriots made some questionable moves from benching Wes Welker to a fake punt. The crowd’s “D-Feet” signs were so well-crafted they looked like they could be in support of the Foot Fetish movement.

The Jets win was a small victory for the Giants. The New York Giants started the beginning of the end for the Patriots dynasty and for the NY AFC team to continue the new tradition of making the Patriots lose big games was a nod of respect. Plus, Pats fans are Red Sox fans and to make those people suffer is unhappy is nice for all of New York.

The victory was worth dying for, or at least it was for one Staten Island man. An intoxicated 46-year old man who is not a role model children, (although, a classic stereotype), died on Sunday when in his game celebrations, he rocketed into traffic on sled, police said. He suffered massive head injuries, even bigger than the one’s to Brady and Belichick’s egos combined.

The driver, a 61-year-old Staten Island woman, remained on the scene, and passed a Breathalyzer test. She was not charged with any crime, just did the standard DWI test that they give everyone in vehicle, on a bike, or a sled. It is Staten Island.

Jets linebacker Bart Scott had a more fun and less fatal post-game energy outburst. In an interview after the game, the fired up big guy brought up Tom Brady’s playoff experience since losing to the Giants in the Super Bowl and ripped him for his performance. “This was the quarterback that couldn’t get touched,” he adamantly stated. “(The media) talk all about how great he’s playing, but what Rex (Ryan) pulled out for us was his last three playoff games – what his record was and what his rating was then. He had a 66 quarterback rating in his last four or five playoff games and you guys didn’t believe that. You guys didn’t look deep enough into the notes.”

Good thing head coach Rex Ryan plays fantasy football.

Also posted on National Lampoon’s Splog, and PlayerPress

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