UConn Women Destroy another Opponent

March 30, 2009

Who says all of the thrill is in close games? The women of UConn have built an exciting undefeated season based entirely by making their opponents embarrassed and ashamed. With their two closest winning margins being ten points, the Huskies are the only true number one seed in this year’s women’s NCAA tournament.

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Enjoy the Madness

March 25, 2009

College “do or die” hoops reminds me that I do, actually, love basketball. Especially in this A.D.D., concise form narrated by a pep band soundtrack.

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Proposed Baseball Movie Plot Lines

March 19, 2009

Hollywood is raking in the money as out-of-work citizens attempt to drown their sorrows in popcorn and cotton candy. Using, “He’s Just Not that Into You” and “Friday the 13th” to forget their woes, Americans are cutting travel, dining and theater out of their budgets, but leaving space for cinema. Movie theatre gross was up 10% last month alone. Studio executives are confident that history will repeat itself. During the Great Depression, when more than one fourth of the country was out of work, Americans still made it a priority to see the latest motion picture. movie2

With tickets to major league baseball game tickets quickly climbing out of reach for the average Joe Six-Pack (let’s not forget about him), what Hollywood should bring to an audience is a good baseball movie.

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DVR Has Nothing on Sports

March 18, 2009

Television hasn’t faced a change like this since the remote control was popularized. Digital Video Recorder (DVR) systems are altering television as we know it. Although the technology was introduced years ago, it hasn’t been until recently that most Americans have some sort of DVR technology for use in their homes. Whether the system is TiVo or Replay TV, whether the system is cable or PC based, the powers to record programs and pause live television are in the hands of the viewer.

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Papelbon Talks Tough to Esquire, Brings out the Beef

March 12, 2009

Thought all the talk around Manny Ramirez was over? You were mistaken. Red Sox Closer Jonathan Papelbon went back in time for an interview with Esquire Magazine to speak about Manny Ramirez’s final days playing in Boston.

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Eagles Fire Handicapped, Retarded?

March 11, 2009

Firing people over their Facebook lifestyle is the new cool thing to do, behind lay offs.

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T.O. Rejected by NFC, Sent to AFC

March 9, 2009

On March 5th, thirty-five year old Terrell Owens was released by the Dallas Cowboys. This could have lead to the following advertisement:

Flamboyant, past-his-prime Wide Receiver seeks fourth NFL team to excite and disrupt. Work Experience: Caught passes from homosexual in San Francisco, lost Superbowl due to tired quarterback vomiting under pressure in Philadelphia, and after learning nothing from Bill Parcells, cried for his team leader Romo when times got tough in Dallas.

In-game hobbies include: light cheerleading, sharpie calligraphy, “bird” dancing, mimicking the “bird” dance, mock waiting tables, napping and other talented improvisational acts. Requires a quarterback who will throw to him on almost every passing play, while forgiving dropped passes and excessive celebration penalties after touchdowns. With questionable overdoses in the past, Terrell Owens is ready for the next team the way his agent is always ready for the next question.

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